VICTORY! ^_^V

Heh. It was a long, hard battle, but my computer has finally stopped losing MB! *glomps Beast* It's finally leveled out at... around 300 free MB, which means there's a gigabyte or two still missing, but before it was 100 free MB and plunging. So this is better. ~_^

I've also managed to get the movie thing to work! Kinda. The new one, which I hate, is finally working. Unfortunately, I really can't be anywhere near as precise as I was on the old one (which still won't let me load saved projects). Solution! Make the video on the NEW one, then load THAT into the old one to work on any finer points, no save/exit/load required. Result!

AND, finally manged to get footage from DVDs onto my computer! Don't know why I couldn't figure it out before. It was completely obvious, but I'm dense sometimes... I expected it to be more complicated then it was. ^^;;

AND, Vanyel updated BCD! *glomps Van* Does NOT suck. Liar. You're just fishing for praise, don't deny it. ~_^
...okay, actually she updated the day after I read chapter 7, but... I haven't checked since then, so... it's still yay and happy, okay? Sheesh.

And, no classes tomorrow! ^_^V My school completely rules. It's not private, but it's not exactly public either, so we pretty much get to make our own rules... and the headmaster declared school cancelled tomorrow! Heh. It's pretty much stopped snowing, so that might have been unnecessary, but too late now. ~_^ Plus, this is the first time we've cancelled classes all year, so we deserve it. Hoo!

AND, I've finally finished the next page of CAGE! Yes! Ha! This page loathed me beyond all reason. I thought page five loathed me. I was wrong. That page only threw a bit of a temper tantrum. This page threw bullets. And flamethrowers. And great big heavy rocks. It was painful. Gods only know why. I've been working on this one page pretty much all month. Wound up drawing two of the panels on one page and the next two on another. Worked, somehow. Go figure. Still not entirely happy with the second panel, but hey! I'm not touching it anymore. Is done! And next page gets to be one of those pretty single-picture full-page things that always love me. And I get to draw the pretty wings again. Yay! ^_^V

And, I really really like the ppls on my RPGs. A lot. Love you! All of you! Okay, I did anyway. But you're reminding me of this lately. *glomps*

And now I want to write something! But I'm almost entirely unconscious, so, no. ;P Heh. I'm not even running on adrenaline anymore. I'm not really sure what I'm running on. Brain cells, probably. I get to sleep in tomorrow, though! ^_^V

Random quote of the moment:
YCCK: I'm trying to read.
S: But I'm cute! Love me!
YCCK: >.< ... *glomps*
S: ^_^V

Happy day! Overall feeling: YES! YES! YES YES YES YES YES! AGAIN! Now I'm gonna go to bed and see if I can regain those lost brain cells. Bai bai! Love you all! *glomps* *kisses*

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT KIND OF CRACK IS SQUARESOFT ON?!

Please, please tell me this is just some kind of sick, sick joke... *shudders* The horror... the horror... I just saw a screenshot of Cloud fighting Hades! Not an evil underworld boss style Hades, but Hades the blue glowing guy from Disney's Hercules. Next to pictures of DUMBO and fucking PIGLET! Okay?! I AM TRAUMATIZED FOR LIFE!

Tidus looks anything but male. Something has gone horribly, horribly wrong with Wakka. And Selphie! Dear gods, Selphie, run! Run for your life, girl!

...what, precisely, is Squall's role in here supposed to be? Oh, yes, I can see it now. "...Whatever. ...You know what? I don't need a gunblade anymore. Seifer! Let's make daisy necklaces and sing songs and dance in fields of flowers and just be friends!"

...I haven't seen any screenshots of Zell. Or Sephiroth. Or Zidane. Thank gods. Keep Disney the hell away from my boys. ...my gods, Tidus... *sob* ...They haven't gotten to Auron or Jecht, have they? Dear gods, tell me they haven't gotten to Auron and Jecht!

Disney! Whatever you bribed Squaresoft with, it had better be one heck of a lot!

*wanders off and curls up in the corner*

Okay, going to go slightly deeper into detail on LoTR now. Slightly. I still think "whoa" kinda sums it all up pretty well.

Legolas surprised me by not being a wimp. Go, Legolas. Seriously, most of the fight scenes, the focus seemed to be on him. Yay. But I can't call him a bad-ass, since he really didn't have enough lines to get an idea of his personality, and being a bad-ass has as much to do with attitude as fighting ability.

Yes, I read the books. I know he had a personality in the books. I'm talking about the movie here, people. There are differences. Few, thankfully. Wonderful job, that.

Only one complaint, and that's the people in the audience. I HAVE NO COMPLAINTS ABOUT THIS MOVIE. Wow. Even FFX was too linear for me, and I worship FFX. This movie was... wow. Holy.

Why do I have complaints about the audience? Well, there were the little old ladies who spent most of the movie whispering to each other, which would have been okay, except for some reason the letter 's' carried completely across the theater. There was the much louder group off to my left, but thanks to my deaf ear they were reduced to a mere background mumble. There was the annoying little kid who kept putting his feet on the back of my seat, and there was--this is the worst--the lady who, when the credits started to roll, said "That was the end?" ...sympathy, I wanted it to go on too, but then she continued "What kind of an ending was that?!" *twitch twitch* Lady, shut the hell up before I turn around and punch you. One of Annoying Lady's friends apparently said something to her, because she then added, "Oh, they're going to do a sequel?" *glare of DOOM* C'mon, people. It's called a trilogy for a reason. And what, the scene with Boromir wasn't enough of a climax for you? Gods. There were also people who complained that it was too long. Seriously, that I just don't understand. I realize, objectively, that it was three hours long, but that's really not a very long time. People just have short attention spans. Really, it was such a rush that I didn't even notice the time. You really get caught up in it.

I'm not going to gush over the movie. There's no need. This movie is holy. This is self-evident. I shouldn't need to explain.

Instead, I'll rant. This is going to be odd. Brace yourselves, people.

Okay. All you people who've been slashing LoTR? Yeah, I know there's a whole lot; I'm talking to all of you. Come here. Closer. No, just a little closer... there. Good. Stay there.

*SLAP!* What the heck is wrong with you people?!

*deep breath* Okay, I'm good.

Now, this is the girl who slashes Superman with Lex Luthor, but seriously, people. LoTR? Okay, shounen-ai is okay, I guess. Maybe. But lemons? Good gods.

When you see this movie, you should be caught up in it. You should be amazed by the beautiful landscapes and the beautiful elves and the incredible fighting and the horrible orcs and the loyalty and the strengthening of friendships and the betrayals and the sheer mind-blowing wonderfullness of it all. You should not look at that last wonderful touching scene between Aragorn and Boromir and be thinking anything needing an NC-17 rating. That is perverting something beautiful. And I am a pervert, don't get me wrong. Damn proud of it. But even I have my standards.

I get it, I really do. I saw all the hints too. I am a slash fan, and the whole friendship between men thing is a pretty big deal in this movie, so obviously there's going to be a slashy taste to it. But you do. Not. Slash. Lord. Of. The. Rings. Period. It is an institution. It is holy. I do not write fics about Jesus and Judas going off and screwing like rabbits, do I? No, I do not. And I'm not even Christian. It's called respect. So leave Aragorn the heck alone.

...Okay, so Superman's an institution too. But the guy runs around in red underwear, for crying out loud.

Bottom line? You can slash whoever the heck you want. To each his (her) own, and it's not like I can stop you anyway. But I maintain that Lord of the Rings should not be slashed. Ever. Period.

Saw LoTR.
Whoa.

Come to think of it, the internet's been doing some major suckage lately, too.

Things I do online:
1. Post/View fanfics.
2. Post/View music videos.
3. Post/View fanart.
4. Post/View webcomics.

...and then there's the whole research thing, but who really cares about that?

But:
1. I haven't touched PL in months. My fault, not the internet's. Moving on.
2. Music video editors broken. Beast's fault. The only place I found to post the full-size, high-quality version goes down almost immediately after I find it. Internet problem number one. I can still download videos, usually from here, but I don't, because of Beast mysteriously misplacing hundreds of megabytes, resulting in no room. Beast problem number two.
3. Fanart. I use Elfwood. Which has not allowed me to update, or even sign in, for ages. Grr. Internet problem number two. Plus, my scanner is busted. Beast problem number three.
4. Webcomics. Keenspace. New servers. Those of you who are on Keenspace, or even just read webcomics, know what I'm talking about. Grr. Internet problem number three. And I did mention the scanner thing.

Downloading of anything has been more or less non-existant, thanks to space issues. Posting of anything also non-existant, due to scanner and space issues. Grr.

Why do I deal with computers? Why bother? Why do I love pain so much?

...so, the only purpose of the internet right now is to write and read fanfics. Which is good, but not enough to keep me entertained by itself. I need either a hundred different actually entertaining things at once, or something truly mindless to keep me occupied for hours. My computer, right now, can handle neither.

On the plus side, I am finally going to go see Lord of the Rings tomorrow. Woo-hoo. I'll finally be able to see for myself whether this Legolas is as wimpy as he looks or as bad-ass as everyone says. And I'll get to watch Aragorn, who kicks serious butt.

>.< Computers suck. They suck monkeys.

Good things about Beast:
1. Connects to the internet fairly reliably.
2. ...um... um...
3. ...I mentioned the internet thing, right?

Bad things about Beast:
1. Free movie editors that won't let you press the stop button or load a saved project
2. Paid-for movie editors that freeze for no apparent reason
3. Randomly losing the cable connection for days on end
4. Losing hundreds of megabytes of space for no apparent reason.
5. Refusing to let me fix the problems mentioned above, due to lack of space. >.<

I just deleted over 600 megabytes in programs and movies. Beast currently has 127 megabytes free. I did not download anything between these two steps. Are we sensing a problem?

...I've had to use System Restore consistently over the past few months, and even that's broken now. It can't be time for a new computer already, can it? @_@

See which Pandora's Box character you are..

"Hey, Katt! I think Green Sorceress jiggles even more than Yellow Sorceress!"
"Remember kiddies, when plundering strange worlds, always bring your six inch heels. ...Yeah, but she doesn't have the butt action going on. Have you tried Blue?"
"Does she jiggle more than Green?"
"I'm not sure. Let me see her run."
"..."
"..."
"...Katt?"
"Let me see it again."
"..."
"..."
"I think you've seen it enough."
"No, I think I need to see it some more."
"..."
"Purely for research purposes."
"Of course."

This Gauntlet Legends Moment has been brought to you by the insane girls with the PS2. Bi girls. We get to stare at the babes and make fun of their outfits. Can't beat it.

Kiti is pissed.
Why is Kiti pissed?
Because no one is e-mailing Kiti. >.<

...okay, stupid reason to be pissed. But I'm used to getting 30+ e-mails when I get home everyday.
Maybe AOL's messing up? *kicks AOL*

Also, 3 gigs of free space have mysteriously disappeared. And I failed Calculus. >.< But I'm still getting that Who's Who biography thing, and at this point an acceptance letter is looking more like a formality than anything else. Overall feeling like I'm getting away with a con. Heh.

But still, no one's e-mailing me. >.<

I am developing a bad habit.



check ME out, i'm rude!
...
no, seriously, ....
Hey, I want to take the Shin-Ra-ite test too, made by !

"ah, yes, rude. you're a man of few words, but if the drunkards in the bar in junon are anything to go by, you seem to be quite the party animal as well (?!). reno's your second best friend, next to alcohol. no one fucks with you, man."

I am a paranoid schizoid schizotypal antisocial histrionic narcissist.
...
...
Huh. Well, I could've told you that. *snorts*

Warning: I'm about to get existential here. Once again, I am warning you. I am boring. My links are interesting. Go read something by someone not boring. Go on, shoo.

Why are you still reading this?

I'm only rambling to clear my own head, you do know that, right? You're under no obligation to read this whatsoever.

I. Am. Boring. Why are you here?

Okay, fine. Go ahead and read.

I've just watched Fight Club. Again. And it's having its usual effect on me. I am ridiculously easily influenced by some movies, and this is one of the worst. And it always leaves me questioning the way I live my own life. That, and wanting to beat the crap out of someone, but that's nothing new. Just brings it to the surface.

The thing about me is that I know what my problems are. I'm a psychiatrist's fucking wet dream. My life is an escapist fantasy, up to and including my career. I'm the textbook definition of bi-polar. I avoid commitment by avoiding relationships entirely. I have an intense fear of the ordinary and so I throw myself into anything and everything out of the ordinary with a vengeance, because I'm afraid that without all that oddity, I'll find out that I'm really a very boring person. Everything in life comes easily to me, so I crave conflict, and create that conflict through self-destructive behavior. See? I get all that. I have problems. Understood. But everyone does. My life is a hell of a lot better than some people's. I've never even been really clinically depressed. Homicidal, yes. Depressed, no. And the homicidal urges can probably be blamed on violent video games.

In other words, I am completely ordinary, and would have been an ideal candidate for Tylor's club. If I'd been male, that is. It is kind of testosterone driven. But hell, I probably have testosterone, I sure act like it.

Am I saying I'm some psycho who wishes Fight Club was real and would join up? Hell no. The fights themselves, at the beginning of the movie, I get. But the whole mission thing, with those space monkey clones? Just as bad as the society they were fighting. Tylor bashes people in designer clothing who are slaves to their bosses, then recruits an army in full uniform who call him 'sir'. And keep in mind, Tylor was insane. I'm as sane as anyone in this world is, and I do not run around blowing up major credit card companies.

But I got two e-mails while I wrote this. One from a mailing list where people dress up as japanese cartoon characters, another from a game where people roleplay as gay video game characters. Stop and think about that for a second. We pretend to be other people. And the people we're pretending to be don't even exist. That's about as escapist as it gets. I'm not saying that's a bad thing. We all deal with existence in our own ways. But stop. Think for a second. What do you do? Don't say your job. I don't care what you do for your job. What do you do outside of work? In your free time? Get online? Surf random people's blogs? Yeah, I thought so. That's okay. I do it too. But what else? Read books? Play video games? Watch tv? All acceptable answers, but what else? If that's all you do, you are someone who needs a fight club.

Long story short. Fighting is good because it reminds us of what's real. We have animal urges. Acknowledge them. Don't keep yourself tied to your computer screen all day. Go climb a mountain. Have you ever stood on top of a mountain or the edge of a cliff and looked down? It doesn't count if you drove up the mountain. When was the last time you broke a sweat? Can you even remember? If no, get off your computer. Right now. If you're reading this, you're obviously not doing anything important. Go race your neighbor's kid around the block, for crying out loud. If the answer to the sweat question was yes, was it at a fitness club? That's cheating. Go join the rest of them climbing the mountain. Go fucking howl at the moon, for god's sake. Go on. Do it. And not through the window. Go outside. That's that place where there's no roof. Scary, I know. Now stop reading this blog. ...For fuck's sake, weren't you listening to me? What in the hell are you still reading this for? Are you really that bored? Get out of here!

Okay, that's done with. Back to video games and comics and all that cool shit.

FFX. Dear holy fucking gods, FFX. *swoons* You've played it, yes? Tell me you've played it. If you haven't played it, WTF are you doing here? Go play it, infidel! I don't care if you have to sell your children into slavery, you MUST BUY THIS GAME.

Since I neglected to blog during the whole FFX-obsession, I'm going to do some back-blogging here.

Dec 27-Jan 1: Where the HELL is my FFX?!?!?! *murders Gamespot* Never, ever preorder anything from anywhere other than Planet Anime, dearies.
Jan 2: Called Gamespot. Tortured poor phone slave girl. Got them to ship a second one (first got lost???)
Jan 3: Overheard many, many people talking about FFX. Got insanely jealous and slightly homocidal. "So, how's FFX?" "It's okay." ...okay? OKAY?! FFX is HOLY, boy! It is not 'okay'! Unworthy beast! *pulls out Quistis-whip and beats the hell out of him*
Jan 4-9: Where the HELL is my FFX?!?!?! *murders Gamespot some more*
Jan 10: Called Gamespot. Tortured phone slave some more. Found out that the order went down the to warehouse, but they never got around to shipping it. What the fuck?
Jan 11: GOT FFX! And nearly proposed to the FedEx lady on the spot. Then proceeded to get sucked into the screen for a week.

Good gods, this game is GOOD. This is like, orgasmic good. I finally got to blitz! And then went through severe blitzing withdrawal for a while. And then blitzed again! Life has regained meaning! I love blitzing. In case you couldn't tell. I know I'm real subtle about it.
And dear gods, some of the bosses! WHY do I love pain? One of these things could use Curaga. And did. Repeatedly. Thank gods for Rikku! *glomps Rikku* People seriously underestimate this girl. Use her right, she is the BEST fighter you've got. I'm serious. Have you SEEN those water gems of hers? Woo! And that speed! The bosses were dead before they knew what hit them! And healing? Al-Bhed potions, people. Can't beat 'em. I. Love. Rikku.
Not like I love Yuna, though. Is it bad to fall for a bunch of pixels? Kind of annoyed I couldn't change her name to Tifa like all the other Fantasy girls, though. >.< That dance... I went back to the Sphere Theatre like twenty times just to watch it again.
Tidus. Is it just me, or do you play as Zell in this game? Tidus looks like the child of Zell and Squall, with all of Zell's personality (and fashion sense). This is not me complaining. I more or less AM Zell, right down to height and birthday, so this was fun for me. Only weird thing about it was that he is NOT a leader. At one point he goes "This is MY story." ...no, it's not. Sorry, boy, but... no. Yuna's, yes. Auron's, maybe. But Tidus's? Hell, no. He's the confused boy in the background. I love him that way, but come on. NOT a leader. At one point he acted like one, and it was strange enough that Rikku commented on it.
Wakka is fun, and my little sister is obsessed with him. I don't get it, but okay. I'm pretty sure he and Tidus are going to be one of the more popular yaoi pairings for FFX, but... ew. Ew, ew, ew, gross, squick. Not that I'm against yaoi (hello? Have you been reading this?) or Wakka (love him to death, I really do), but he thinks of Tidus as his BROTHER. For crying out loud, he grabs you in a headlock whenever he's annoyed with you. I think I'm going to avoid FFX yaoi in general.
Lulu. Star's favorite character. She's like a weird combo of Edea and Quistis. And why is her moogle dead? That disturbs me. And her lectures at the beginning annoyed me beyond all reason. But I still went "Aww, poor Lu" during that side quest. I am such a girl sometimes. And yes, I call her Lu. I love Lu. She just irritates me.
Kimahri. ...pretty much a nonentity for most of the game. Sorry, Kimahri. When he's actually on-screen, though, he rocks. Loved that Mount Gagazet scene. And oh my gods, when the Ronso sang... not the best singers, some of them, but it's my favorite version of the song so far. I. Love. Ronso. That whole scene was just great. And Kimahri's my back up healer, so Yuna pretty much stays out of battle except when she's summoning. Which is the way I like it, I don't like her getting knocked out... geez, I really am a girl sometimes, aren't I? >.<
Seymour scares the hell out of me. What's up with the outfit? He reminds me of something when you see him from behind. The word 'slug' is in my head, but that's wrong. I think it must be one of those freaky DBZ wizard-type things. Or something. But that aeon of his disturbs me. Seriously disturbs me. Its overdrive? *shudders* I do NOT want Yuna getting that aeon. Ever. Ever, ever, ever. Creepiness. Seymour's going to be big in yaoi fics, though, I can tell. Listen to the man's voice. And his outfit. Gayer than Kuja, but not nearly as sexy. Of course, he's so focused on Yuna, I can't picture pairing him with anyone else... his obsession with Yuna wasn't really romantic, though, so I'm sure the yaoi writers will get around that, no problem. And I will avoid those fics like the plague. Squick me out.
Auron. Oh. My. Gods. Auron. I fucking love Auron. Not in a bishounen way. I don't love any of these guys in a bishounen way. And not in an identification way, cause I identify with Tidus beyond all reason. And he annoyed the hell out of me for most of the game. But... I don't know. There's something about him. He just rules. I'll leave it at that. And dear gods. Have you seen this cosplayer? He is Auron.
And look at the picture to the far right. Who's that next to him? JECHT! *squeal* I LOVE Jecht. Seriously. Beyond all reason. My favorite character, I think, if I had to pick one. Not in a bishounen way, again. And not quite in an identification way, all though that's a lot closer. But I love him, and why aren't there any FMVs of him? Unless he's in the end. I hope he is. I've got all the Jecht spheres, and they're one of my favorite parts of the game. Just wish you could watch them over again, like normal spheres. And the Jecht shot? Hoo! That kicks serious butt. I am SO glad there's a Jecht cosplayer. I was sure no one would ever cosplay him, but someone has already! ...I've seen someone else too, actually, but he was scrawny, so I'm going to stick with the one in that picture with Auron. No offense to the other Jecht cosplayer. But when you're cosplaying someone shirtless, please, PLEASE have the body for it.
I'm throwing together a Rikku cosplay, because I do have the body for it. Maybe a little more muscular than she is, but toned-muscular, not huge-muscular, so I don't think that should be too much of a problem. And when I get my hair cut for Kurai, I'll be able to do that funky haircut she has exactly. Yeah! I can get in character for her real easy, too. She's like female Zell, only a little more blonde. And I love the Al-Bhed. Except when I have to blitz against them. They're the only people I've lost against since the first season. Grr. That's okay, though, challenge is good.
Speaking of cosplay, check out the kick-ass japanese FFX cosplayers here. Dear gods. There's even that blond chick in Luca who actually wants to see you play. People are cosplaying minor characters like that. Wow. And that Seymour on the front page is fucking gorgeous, even though game-Seymour squicks me out. Is that a guy or a girl? Either way, gorgeous.

Anyway, it's been a week since I got the game, and I'm at the end. Going off to fight Sin. Except I'm not, yet. I'm going back over the entire path that we took on Yuna's pilgrimage. Yes, I am that obsessively sentimental. Deal with it. I've got all the Jecht spheres already, though, including the Auron and Braska ones, which depresses me. I want more Jecht, damnit! He reminds me of Raizen, in a weird way. Except without the I-worship-you vibe. More like a lets-go-blitz/drink/fight-fiends-together vibe. o.o ...should I be worried about my taste in friends?

I have finally been pried away from the game, though, for the Big Game. (Football, for the non-sports-inclined of you.) And hearing them use the word 'blitz' is really, really weird for me now.

Sports are better underwater.

Now I'm looking for a FFX pbem rpg. Except all the ones I've stumbled across so far (and there haven't been many) look like they'll suck beyond all reason. I hate that. Depends on the players, I guess, but none of them seem to have any sort of a story going, which annoys me. I think I'll just wait for some FFX characters to join my Zell rpg. It's yaoi, but Zell's kinda taken already, so we should be able to avoid that aspect of it. I hope a Jecht joins, I want to see Zell and Jecht hang out together. Or Zell and Tidus. Hmm. Zell and Tidus in the same room. Should I be frightened?

Warning: this is going to be serious. Read at your own risk.

...You gone yet?

...No?

...Too late, I'm ranting now. *pulls out the soapbox*

Look, I've never thought of myself as a particularly strong person. Physically, yeah, but I was born that way, and it's never really been particularly useful, aside from opening pickle jars and that kind of thing. I'm talking about mental strength here, people. The kind that actually matters. But even though I've never thought of myself as particularly strong, I sure as hell don't think of myself as weak. And I don't want anyone else thinking of themselves that way, either.

I am a freak. I don't mean goth, or punk, or alternative, or that weird mix of all three that's so popular among posers these days. I mean a real freak. The kind that sits off to one side and doesn't fit in ANY group. We're not even really nerds or geeks. We probably mix a few qualities from all these groups. We might occasionally hang out with the other freaky categories, but we're not one of them. We're just... us. There's usually only a few of us in each school, not enough to really get a label. You know what I'm talking about. If you're here, you probably are one.

For some reason, way back in middle school, a whole bunch of us--freaks, nerds, geeks, goths, whatevers--were sent off to the counselors, en masse. We had this little unit about self esteem. One of the first things the counselor said to my group was, "Now, I know it's hard, being different. I know you probably don't think you're as good as everyone else..."

Stop. Rewind.

Erase tape.

Screw that. I don't know about the rest of you, but I have been a freak my whole life. I never wanted to be popular. If I did, I would be popular. It's not like it's all that difficult; all I have to do is show up in a skirt and a tank top and I've got ten different requests for dates. (Won twenty bucks that way. Ha!) But dear gods, why would I want to? Come on, you know what I'm talking about here. You've probably spent a lot of time making fun of 'normal' people yourself. Do you want to be one? I think not. And if they make fun of you? I haven't experienced that since middle school, but going on memory here, my reaction was--yeah, who cares? I don't know you. You don't like me. This should matter to me because...?

Here's the thing. When someone complains about something you do, you usually ignore them because they have no idea what they're talking about, right? But what if they're a freak, like you, and they still complain? Is being different a reason to assume that they're any more intelligent than the 'normal' people?

I think not. My mind process here--You don't like what I'm doing. You say that because of what I'm doing, I am worthless. My options: 1. agree with you, which makes me worthless. 2. disagree, which makes you a moron who doesn't know what s/he's talking about. Am I worthless? Hell no. Therefore, you are a moron, and you are wasting my time. Goodbye.

But there are a few people who let the morons get to them. They'll give up whatever they were doing--say, for example, writing a truly beautiful story--because someone told them they are pathetic. And they'll believe this person, because they think they aren't strong enough to stand up for themselves.

You are not pathetic. You are not a waste of skin. Period. Every life means something, and that sounds like complete idealistic crap, but that doesn't make it any less true. You think you're weak? Then don't be. Decide to be strong, and guess what? You are! Strength is a mental thing, people! That means you can control it! You want physical strength too? Great! Take a martial arts course, they'll train you mentally and physically.

I am a bitch, and I'll be the first to admit it. I am the bitch of my little group of friends. When someone hurts one of my friends, I am the one who will be in their face and they will regret it. Because I don't care what you say about me, I really don't. Whatever you think about me is your problem, not mine. But some of my friends are nice people who actually listen to what other people have to say about them, and if you hurt them, you will pay.

The people involved know what I'm talking about. For those people who've stumbled across this page and have no idea who I am--look, I don't care who you are, never let anyone tell you you're pathetic, you got that? Ever.

Sorry, haven't blogged for a while. Just one thing to say:
FFX isn't just a mindfuck. It makes love to your mind. Repeatedly. With chocolate covered strawberries. And then it chokes you to death. Over. And over. And over again. Until you expect it to stop killing you and just ask why you love pain so much.
Squaresoft. Is. Love.